You are not being left behind - how to stop worrying you’ll end up alone!

As a side note, my brother used to describe me as an endearing mix of Bridget Jones and Edwina from Absolutely Fabulous. I'm still not entirely sure it was meant as a compliment, but there was probably a fair bit of truth in it.

As the eternally single one out of my friends and family, and usually the one getting myself in horrendously embarrassing situations, I totally identified with lovely Bridge. 

I spent years convinced I was somehow getting life wrong. Whilst everyone else seemed to be meeting people, getting engaged, buying houses and having babies, I was collecting awkward dating stories and wondering why none of it was happening for me.

If I'm honest, the thing that frightened me most wasn't dating itself. It wasn't bad dates or rejection. It was the fear that everyone else would move on with their lives and I'd somehow be left behind.

Maybe you know that feeling too.

👉 You watch your friends get engaged, announce pregnancies and head off on family holidays, whilst quietly wondering when it's going to be your turn. You smile, celebrate them and genuinely feel happy for them, but there's still that little voice that pipes up afterwards asking, "What about me?"

It can feel like everyone else has been handed the rule book and somehow you missed the memo.

Looking back now, I wish I could give that younger version of me a hug because there was never anything wrong with her. She just hadn't realised that whilst she was desperately trying to build a relationship with someone else, she'd forgotten to build one with herself.

Ironically, this is exactly where coaching starts.

People often assume my job is helping someone "get the guy." It isn't.

The first thing we do is take the spotlight off dating for a little while and put it back where it belongs. On you.

💛 We build your confidence. 

💛 We work through the stories you've been carrying around for years about not being enough, being too much or somehow running out of time. 

💛 We strengthen your boundaries, challenge your patterns and help you create a life that already feels exciting, meaningful and full.

Because here's what I've learned after coaching hundreds of women.

The healthiest relationships aren't built by women desperately trying to be chosen. They're built by women who know they're already enough.

Women who date from self respect rather than fear.

Women who know a relationship will add to their life, not become their entire life.

That doesn't mean you stop wanting love. Of course you still want it. It simply means your happiness, confidence and sense of self are no longer dependent on whether this date works out or whether someone texts you back.

The other person becomes the cherry on the cake, not the whole bloody cake.

And the funny thing is, when you stop making someone else responsible for your happiness, dating becomes so much lighter. You stop forcing things, you stop chasing unavailable people and you stop treating every date like an interview for the rest of your life.