“He’s pulling away, what should I do?”
So each week, without fail, I get a few messages from incredible, accomplished women.
Women with full lives, successful careers, deep friendships, and so much to offer.
And the questions are almost always the same:
💛 “How do I win my ex back?”
💛 “He’s pulling away, what should I do?”
💛 “Am I asking for too much?”
💛 “Why do I feel so anxious all the time?”
What breaks my heart isn’t the questions themselves (let's be honest we have alllllll asked these!) but it’s the amount of self-doubt behind them.
Because so often, these women aren’t confused about what’s happening.
They’re anxious because they’re trying to make something work that doesn’t feel safe, right or mutual.
So here’s a reminder you might need today:
Stay single until you find someone who makes you feel seen, heard, and respected.
👉 Someone who is willing to grow with you.
👉 Someone who can talk things through instead of shutting down or disappearing.
👉 Someone who actually shows up (emotionally and practically).
2026 is not the year for settling. Not for shoddy behaviour. Not for mixed signals. Not for breadcrumbs disguised as “potential.”
And no, this isn’t about being cold, guarded, or impossible to please. It’s about being discerning.
Because when dating consistently fills you with anxiety…
When you’re overthinking texts, managing their moods, or shrinking your needs to keep the peace…
When your body feels tense instead of calm…
That’s not you being “too much.”
That’s your nervous system telling you something is off.
One of the most powerful skills you can develop in dating isn’t knowing how to hold on, it’s knowing when to walk away.
Not because someone is a bad person (or they might be).
But because your needs aren’t being met.
Because you’re not compatible.
Because the relationship costs you your peace.
So yes, that includes saying no to:
👉 Inconsistent communication
👉 Emotional unavailability
👉 Conversations that go nowhere
👉 Relationships where you’re doing all the emotional labour
No one is perfect. Real relationships require effort, compromise, and growth.
But the right person will be willing to:
👉 Grow the relationship with you
👉 Listen without defensiveness
👉 Talk things through when it’s uncomfortable
👉 Support your dreams and goals
👉 Meet you with respect, consistency, and care
This stage of life isn’t about forcing love to work.
It’s about growing into the version of you who is ready for a healthy, grounded, mutual relationship.
And that growth often looks like choosing yourself.
Holding standards.
Trusting your intuition.
And walking away when something costs you your peace.
👉 I'm offering a free 30 minute call to chat through your options. You can book your free call HERE, and if there aren't times that suit, I'll create one for you. Just reply to this email!
