Journaling questions to change your love life
As a coach, there’s nothing I love more than a good question ( & honestly, I’m obsessed with the ones below)
When I started working on my love life (which, let’s be real, was an absolute sh*t show, never had a boyfriend, exclusively dated idiots and emotionally unavailable men), nothing changed overnight.
I had to go right back to the beginning and look at my love blueprint.
That meant getting really honest about:
👉 who I was
👉 who I wanted to be (and what I actually wanted)
👉 why I was getting the same cr*ppy results on repeat
👉 where my triggers and insecurities came from
👉 and, the uncomfortable bit, what my role was in all of it
Before that, I blamed everything: men, dating apps, my age, my body, my looks. And all that did was keep me stuck, going round in circles.
Once I had real awareness of my patterns, my emotional state, and what was actually blocking me from meeting someone (spoiler: I had to take a long, hard look at my own availability and readiness to be seen and loved), then things started to shift.
Awareness came first.
Action came second
Change came third.
SO, here are some brutal questions that might just change your love life forever.
✨ What version of me shows up in love — and is that who I want it to be?
Am I leading with fear, walls, hyper-independence, or people-pleasing… or am I actually letting myself be seen?
✨ What unmet needs am I trying to fill through relationships?
Attention? Validation? Safety? Belonging?
✨ What patterns keep repeating in my love life and what’s my role in them?
If it keeps happening, it’s not bad luck. There’s something here to look at.
✨ 4. What belief about love am I scared to admit I carry?
“Love is hard.”
“I’ll be abandoned.”
“All men are the same.”
“I’ll lose myself if I get close.”
These stories run the show unless you challenge them.
✨ What would I have to give up to have the love life I want?
Avoidance.
Your ex.
The walls.
The fantasy of being chosen without having to be vulnerable.
✨ What am I tolerating that I know I shouldn’t be?
Mixed signals.
Breadcrumbs.
Emotional unavailability.
Waiting for someone to decide.
✨ What do I genuinely believe I deserve and why?
This belief dictates everything. Who you choose. What you accept. How you show up.
If you want a different experience in love, the shift starts within you, with awareness of:
🖋️ the beliefs you’re carrying
🖋️ the emotions you avoid
🖋️ the patterns you repeat
🖋️ and the needs you’re unconsciously trying to meet
Sit with these questions. Take your time. Don’t censor yourself.
And if this hit something and you’re ready to:
💛 stop looping the same patterns
💛 build real, secure self-worth
💛 and open yourself up to emotionally available love
You know where I am.
👉 If you'd like to get a sneak peek into the exact work I did to go from eternally single to engaged in a year PLUS the work my amazing clients do, I'm kicking off the new year with new spaces for 1:1 coaching.
