How to ask ‘What are we’?
# 1 thing you need to have the awkward dating conversations (and your free Dating Communication Guide included 🎤)
Happy Friday! I'm on a time limit today as am taking some time out to paint our house, so I'll get straight to it.
I don’t know about you, but I used to hate asking or answering certain dating questions. You know the ones:
“When was your last relationship?” (…awkward, because I’d never had one)
“What are you looking for at the moment?” (…silently praying they’d say “relationship”)
“What is this?” (…hoping they’d want exclusivity but terrified to ask)
Every time one of those conversations came up, I would tense up and become someone who didn’t feel like me.
I was either too awkward, too passive, or I bulldozed the moment because I was nervous.
And nine times out of ten, the conversation didn’t go the way I hoped.
What I’ve realised in the looooong years that followed is that communicating in dating isn’t actually about perfect wording. The words we use account for 7% of our communication, with a much higher emphasis being placed on body language and tone.
I've learned the crucial elements to handling these kinds of questions (both asking and answering them):
👉 You have to own your story rather than feel ashamed of it
👉 You have to know what you want
👉 You have to be genuinely excited about what you’re looking for
👉 You have to practise (yes, really)
Because when you’re happy with where you are, when you know your worth, and when you’re excited about what’s ahead… those conversations stop feeling scary.
And the difference isn’t just in your words, it’s in your presence.
Good energy looks like:
📍 Sitting in a relaxed position rather than hunching over
📍 Making eye contact and smiling
📍 A lighter, easier tone of voice
📍Not trying to force an outcome or corner someone into matching your pace
If you want to start building that confidence, or you struggle with communicating and speaking up, I’ve created a completely free communication guide for you.
It’s full of scripts, examples, boundary phrases, how-to’s, and body-language tips so you feel confident when:
➡️ Moving things offline
➡️ Asking what they’re looking for
➡️ Talking about exclusivity
➡️ Handling someone pulling away
➡️ Setting boundaries early on
➡️ Asking for more communication
➡️ Saying no to home dates
➡️ And every other “oh god I don’t know how to say this” moment
This guide will show you not just what to say, but how to say it, in a way that feels empowered, secure and clear.
If you want it, you can download it here:
👉 DOWNLOAD YOUR FREE DATING COMMUNICATION GUIDE
I made this because communication is one of the biggest blocks I see in dating, and once you master it, everything else becomes easier: boundaries, clarity, connection, pace, emotional safety, all of it.
I hope you love it.
And as always, my inbox is open.
👉 I offer a free 30 minute call to chat through your coaching options. You can book your free call HERE, and if there aren't times that suit, I'll create one for you. Just reply to this email!
